Moscow, Washington, Kiev – Ukrainian Prime Minister Arseniy Yatsenyuk accuses Russia of wanting to instigate a’ Third World War’. Since the last such major event is now almost 70 years since the postilion has researched usual reputable and offers its readers exclusive the most important tips to prepare for WWIII:
Could soon be new European currency: Vodka () – now is the time for hoarding is. The cute little creatures multiply in no time and serve for longer stays bunker as an important protein supplier.
– The Third World War is the unanimous opinion of experts in a matter of minutes (nuclear devastation! ). For the final phase of the war, therefore, a granola bar just fine
-. On vodka you should not do without. He is to welcome the Russian front-line troops in your front yard essential.
– Obtain a large scale for the cigarette black market after the war. Keep ready for the Non smoking black market a few carrots.
A billiard room should be in every bunker – Sit back comfortably, while your neighbor is building a fallout shelter. Shoot him and then annexing the building. In war there is anyway be no functioning judicial system more
-. Too much ambition can be harmful. Try not even to get a pair of each animal in your bunker.
– Before closing the shelter if it does not concern bearded Russian special forces without emblem on your alleged family members
-. If you have the intention in a hopeless situation to kill himself (! nuclear devastation ), let Blondie at least alive, you bastard!
Caution ! Although bananas look like this, but no weapon – If you do not own nuclear missiles, it is advisable to find a possible straight stick in the forest and to sharpen with a pocket knife. Moment: you have a pocket knife? This is of course much better
– Grab Find Pets (about chinchilla, guinea pigs, Dachshund) introduce you best in bloodthirsty mutant version (nuclear devastation! ). Maintain a sufficiently strong chain
Typical Feldtweet -. Send your relatives on the front Feldtweets regularly. Subsequent state and provincial archives will thank you
-. Always keep your phone with video function (nuclear devastation! ) Ready. Should there ever be such a thing as YouTube, their livelihood is secured.
– Nervous your grandchildren for decades with your amazing hero stories from the war.